By Its Cover
Episode 1: To the Frontier and Beyond!
As this is the inaugural posting of the new featurette “By Its Cover” a brief explanation is due. This is going to be a weekly post featuring the best and brightest in the world of upcoming games across all consoles and the PC world. I will focus on one game at a time and give my industry leading analysis of each game. Since my great grandmother was a french psychic, and my other great grandmother once won a lotto scratcher; I believe I have been imbued with the gift of foresight. Given this, each game that is analyzed will not fall into the following: they will not be played, not be looked at, and not be researched in any way. Their covers will be the only thing that I actually look at. Understand? I know you do! So let’s go already!
This week’s upcoming game is Star Trek: Bridge Simulator VR, Star Trek Bridge Simulator champions the long misunderstood life of a star-ship captain, and let me tell you, having claimed to be one on several occasions it is often totally misunderstood. So often people get locked into the glamour of the various documentaries showcasing this life, but much like Discovery’s epic sea opera “Deadliest Catch” the world is so much different in real life that the two might be considered totally different experiences. Star Trek: Bridge Simulator VR will surely show this.
In the game you are given command of the titular ship the “U.S.S. Bridge”. A ship designed to ferry people from point A to point B across the stream of space. An epic vessel equipped with the highest performing espresso machines, self tanning robots, and deadly deadly photon printers. It will be your job, as the captain of this vessel, to make coffee and sandwiches for your crew while simultaneously defending the Galactic Empire Federation from clingy ex-girlfriends, Romans, and Biological Cybernetic Organisms, also known as the CORG (not to be confused with the species of small dogs, which are also featured in the game’s mercenary missions).
When I didn’t play this I thought the most interesting feature of the game was the plethora of romantic encounters available throughout the game. There are so many of these that it would surely make “Stardew Valley” blush. Then, upon seeing it blush, you’d realize that Stardew is a strong and capable crew member, and try your hardest to bed them. This feature is incredibly important to touch upon and I am glad the developers decided to include it. People often take for granted the difficulty in managing a large crew upon a space faring vessel, and I assure you that regular promiscuous activity with the crew is incredibly important. This includes the men and women, and, especially, the aliens. Each and every crew member must be given the time and attention that they deserve to ensure a safe voyage. Mas and Pas reading this may be worried but I urge you to relax because it is done behind a silk curtain, and only back lit by soft candle light. Tastefully shot, and very artistic.
In this way Star Trek: Bridge Simulator VR is perhaps the greatest VR experience ever. It is a job simulator, a beach simulator, a dating simulator, and yes- a dog walking simulator all wrapped into one beautiful experience. It touches upon the realism in a day-to-day captain’s life, and doesn’t give in to the romanticized version of reality presented on television and in movies. It shows the grittiness and hardship of living in a big hard ship. It gives the player the ability to face the most misunderstood job known on earth, and then try to bed it. However, the question still remains; “Is it a spaceship captain simulator too?” The answer is a definite, and resounding, maybe.
Look out for Star Trek: Bridge Simulator VR on May 30th! I’ll be back and bring to you another “By It’s Cover”, next week!
We provide our opinions of experience with the video games. We write or review by being a consumer and share our voice in the gaming industry.